July 25-26 Stevensville MD Chesapeake Bay Cook-off

A new team is forming and there is nothing I can do to stop it………

When picking days off during the summer months I was told that I could not have the date of July 25th as I requested. No big deal, I had been given most of the other days I had asked for and the contest was only 1 ½ hours away. Erich was taking the entire day off and volunteered to haul the trailer down to Stevensville and begin to set up. My wife Jo, who would cook the seafood contest Friday night, went along on the trip from Street to the eastern shore. Al picked up our chicken and would meet them there.

Everything came together as Bobby worked a ½ day then drove right to the site. The teammates set up the site and began to prep the meat before I was even off work. I finished work at 5:00 and took off for the contest. I had the radio on during the afternoon and was listening to the traffic reports for the Bay Bridge which is usually jamming on a Friday evening. All reports were saying no back ups so I decided to take a chance and take that route.

The trip went off without a hitch and I arrived at the contest site around 6:30 to find a complete set up, most of the meat was trimmed and resting in the cooler as it should be at this time, we weren’t behind at all, and I hadn’t even been there. Hmmmm, what did they need me for, I thought to myself. They did leave the brisket for me to trim, I suppose to make me feel at least a little useful.

They were going to let me help Jo get her entry boxed, although I noticed when I started grilling the shrimp, Al came over and took the tongs from my hands. Oh well, I took a walk around the grounds and greeted some of the other teams. After the seafood turn-in I returned to the site and trimmed the brisket. After which, we enjoyed a great meal complete with farm fresh tomatoes and sweet corn, man, was it good.

After dark, we were treated to a great 20 minute fireworks display, Erich broke out the stogies and all was well, or was it, things had run a little too smooth in my absence. I sensed something was afoot. I’d have to get to the bottom of this one.

My plan was to ply them with alcohol, then ask a few general questions to see what I could find out. The plan was moving along nicely, with plenty of beers being knocked off during dinner and the fireworks. Then I broke out the Crown Royal and Patron. Things get a little foggy from here on out, I think I forgot what to ask. Come to think of it, I think I even forgot the focus of the investigation. Oh well, we got the big meats in on time and took a leisurely stroll around the site visiting with the other teams, to hell with the inquisition, I’d work on that in the morning.

The weather was great and I think even got a few hours sleep, with the exception of a rather loud laughing girl a few sites down. I don’t think they knocked off until after 3 AM. These organizers really need to enforce quiet times. Most teams agree, but there are always a few…..

The next morning I was up early prepping the ribs for the fire. I was joined by the usual suspects, Bobby and Al, with a special guest appearance by Erich. He will claim he always rises early, to which we all disagree. We were all in stitches when Christy from the VA Pirates wondered into our site at around 9:00 AM and exclaimed upon seeing a vertical Erich, “what are you doing up?” Nuff said.

The cook went surprisingly well. Timing was on, no rushing; things went into the box without too much trouble. I think we only ventured into the last five minutes of one window. I ranked our boxes from best to worse, brisket, chicken, ribs, pork. The judges agreed for the most part, as you can see by the results. The best part was Jo’s seafood dish took 2nd place. We were all very happy for her and she was beaming when she walked up to collect her ribbon.

Our goal here was to try and break into the top ten overall, and we were successful for the first time this year with our sixth place finish. We are moving in the right direction, 16th Salisbury, 14th Chesapeake, 11th Landover and now 6th. I would like to keep it up, time will tell.

After we packed up the gear and were waiting for the awards, the fellows finally spilled the beans. They are considering starting their own team, now that they realize they don’t need me around barking out orders, they can get along just fine without me. Some are planning on passing out resumes at the Bel Air contest. I think they are serious, they have even come up for a name for the new team, “We were those guys!” Then, they say, I have to change the name of my team to “Where are those guys?”

I wonder what this is going to cost me. I wonder if it’s not too late, if I can reform and be a better person, a better, more understanding, more compassionate and flexible leader. Maybe I will experience a revelation of sorts, similar to old Ebenezer Scrooge on Christmas morning.

Wait a minute, hold the phone, me, more compassionate, more understanding, and dare I say flexible,……..nahhhh...... I don’t see THAT happenin!

ISS Competition Cooking Class

You want me to do WHAT to my chicken?!???!

The weekend of July 28-29 team mate Al and I traveled to Warminster PA, just north of Philadelphia to the home of the BBQ Guru for the I Smell Smoke cooking class. The class was to be held in a contest format and included everything from meat selection to box building and presentation. Steve Farin even promised to reveal their new, top secret and successful chicken method. I couldn’t wait; we both were looking forward to the event.

Dan Hixon from the successful 3 Eyzs BBQ team, fresh off their third Grand Championship win at The Art of BBQ held in New Jersey, was planning to join us for the weekend. Al and I arrived early and began to set up. We were about halfway finished when Jim from Pequea Pullers parked next to us, remember Jim , the “cherry guy” from Bel Air. Jim is a good cook and an all around nice fellow from near Lancaster PA. He always travels with a jar of cherries that are usually swimming in some type of high octane rum. Another word to describe them would be flame throwers, wow, they are strong.

Anyway, before we finished our setup, out new neighbor Jim was set up, had out his lawn chair, had mixed himself a drink, and was lighting up a cigar as he sat down to watch the rest of us finish our work. Now, either I am bringing way too much junk or Jim has a bit of Houdini blood in his veins, (maybe from all of those cherries), but I gotta pay attention to my buddy Jim next time to see what I am doing wrong. He’s always got a prime seat to watching the world go by, and I have to admire that!

It wasn’t long and the class began. Steve and the rest of the I Smell Smoke team did a great job of explaining how they select the cuts that they cook and also what they do to prepare the meat for the cooker. They were very patient and answered all of the questions that were asked. Regular readers of this blog will know that Steve Farin is my BBQ mentor and basically taught me what little I know about cooking competition Que. I had cooked with Steve in the past but never had the opportunity to take notes and observe his work from a student’s perspective. It was great.

After demonstrating all the prep work, we were all given a full load of contest meats to take back to our sites and get ready to cook. The ISS gang wandered around, observed, answered questions, and gave pointers to everyone as we prepped our own meats for the cooker. Dan, Al and I worked to get our meats ready as instructed. It was then that Steve asked if I had any extra room in my cooker for his big meats, as they did not bring their competition trailer which contains the cookers they use in competition.

“Sure” I said without even hesitating. I had plenty of room. It wasn’t until after all of the meat, his and ours was prepped and shoved into the Tall Boy that it hit me. What if I blew it and ruined his meats. He was the teacher, the instructor, the Mack Daddy, if I didn’t properly cook his stuff, I couldn’t hide in the back of the class like I could if I had only ruined my meat, the whole world would know, particularly Steve, my friend and mentor. I couldn’t let him down. Needless to say, I didn’t sleep a wink all night, worrying about the cook. It was even worse than at a contest, and I can’t explain why.

The next day when I joked with Steve that he had applied too much pressure on me with his meat cooking, he calmly, (as he always is), said that if mine didn’t turn out, he would just grab someone else’s to use for demonstrational purposes. Why didn’t I think of that, if I had, I might have been able to grab a few hours of shut eye.

The BBQ Guru team did a great job with the class setup. They served up a super dinner Saturday night that included Phili style pork loin sammys, complete with broccoli rob and provolone cheese. I had never had this sandwich before, but it sure was good. After dinner we were given a tour of the Themomegatech / Guru shop. My only comment here is WOW. I always thought that Shotgun Fred, the company founder was an on the ball guy, but I think I had underestimated him, genius is more fitting. The guy has 23 US patents registered in his name. Speaking of Fred, you will remember he suffered a stroke while attending the contest in Salisbury this past April. Fred was in attendance at the class on both Saturday and Sunday, looking good and in great spirits. It was a real blessing seeing and speaking to Fred after what he has been through.

Overall, I found the class to be very informative and helpful and I look forward to using some of our newly acquired skills in the next competition, which for us is July 25-26 at Stevensville, MD. I also enjoyed hanging out with fellow competitors Dan, Steve, Brett and Jim. It was good having time to shoot the breeze without the pressure that exists when involved in a contest. Anytime you get that many BBQ cooks together, you know you are in for some good stories, a few cold beers, and a lot of laughs, trust me, this weekend did not disappoint.

If you ever get the chance and you want to try and improve your game, I would suggest taking a class. Even for an experienced cook, it is great to see what others are doing and I am sure you will pick up a few tips that will help you gain a few more points. It is money well spent in my humble opinion. Even for the average backyard BBQer, (like yours truly), a class cuts months and months off of the learning curve.

Some of you may recall my battle this winter past with our friend the yardbird. I have to tell you, these guys at ISS have a whole new twist on the chicken attack. If I had known then what I know now……well..…I guess its back to the drawing board!

Are you ready you retire from competition cooking?

Retire? we are just getting started...........

There was an interesting post on the BBQ Brethren Forum last week that asked the question, are you ready to retire from competition cooking? I read with interest the numerous posts and comments with regard to this very interesting topic.

While I am not ready to retire as of yet, I will say that I intend to cut back a bit next year. This is due to two main reasons, rising costs and not enough weekends. This is our second year of competition. The first year we did 4 events, this year 7, toss in a weekend cooking class and that’s 2 months of weekends blocked out of the calendar. While some may say that’s nothing, I think it’s a lot.

For me, a contest is a 5 day deal. Wednesday, check over the trailer make sure everything is in place. Thursday, go to the store, pick up meats, prep sauces etc. Friday, travel to the contest. Saturday, travel home, crash out. Sunday, clean out trailer, empty coolers, odds and ends, etc. It is a lot of work.

Don’t ask me on Sunday if I want to do another contest, you might not like the answer. But, after a day or two of rest and refueling, I am anxious for the next contest scheduled for our team and busy working on ways to improve our product. Certainly not ready to retire.

We are about to enter into a stretch of 3 contests in 6 weeks, Stevensville, Bel Air, then New Holland. In retrospect, I don’t think this was very good planning on my part. Of course, in March, when planning the upcoming season, our team has been idle since October, causing a bit of fog to enter into my vision. Seven contests, 3 in a six week period, no problem. Bel Air is our home event and we really like New Holland, so my guess is Stevensville will be a one time shot for us, unless they move the date.

We then will go from New Holland at the end of August, to Dover, the season ender, held in the middle of October, another month and a half of down time. Although I am sure that after our six week run, no one will complain about a few weeks off.

One problem I see from a competitor’s viewpoint is the scheduling of events within our region. While we were at Landover, there was another event held just north of here in Yardley PA on the same weekend. The Stevensville date is close to Bel Air. More than likely, this will cause us to skip that event next year. I would think that event planners would try to spread events around a bit to try and maximize the amount of team participation.

I know I am drifting off topic here and for that I apologize. My original point is this competition cooking takes a lot of effort, which is a fact. Planning, competing, cleaning up, all takes time. I enjoy the effort and don’t mind the work. My only concern is the block of time involved, and what gets neglected as a result. My kids are pretty much grown, so its not a matter of running them around. Summer weekends are a prime time to have friends over to eat outside on the deck, enjoying the nice weather and the garden. That would be if my garden wasn’t over run with weeds, another result of my time limitations.

Seven events, 5 days per, that’s almost a month, that’s a lot of time, particularly when you have to work for a living. And I, for one, HAVE to work for a living, not only to pay for this rather expensive hobby, but to keep a roof over our heads. When the wife and I look over a summer calendar, with BBQ, family vacation, a few weddings and other events we are committed to, we have not much time left for entertaining and or working around the house trying to keep things in some order. Although I will admit, the ladder has never been one of my strong points.

So, in conclusion, I guess my point is, time flies when you are having fun. It is almost July 4th and before you know it, Labor Day will be upon us, the significance or point of this rambling post, I have no idea. What I do know is, when you are busy, time moves quickly, when you are bored, time goes in reverse. Am I ready to retire from this crazy sport? no way. Will we cut back next year? Today’s answer is yes, we’ll see what my answer is next March.

One thing is for sure, life is too short to work all the time. You have to get out and enjoy yourself in order to make life worth living. Even if it takes some work to be able to have fun. All work and no play, blah blah blah. I have enjoyed the first half of our season and look forward to the rest of the contests. As for retiring, I leave that for the other guys, just don’t ask me the day after a competition.

Landover MD Beltway BBQ Showdown June 6-7

Do we really need red wine?

The plan was to take a half day off leaving the office around lunchtime on Friday. The trailer was loaded, the meats and the beer were on ice, everyone was ready to roll. I work from a home office and started work a little early to lessen the impact of taking a ½ day off, as we had a lot of work going on. I started work at 4:30 AM. It was close to 1:30 when I left to get on the road, which is not including a lunch hour. I might not be very good at what is now called the new math, but that sure sounds like 9 hours to me. No matter how you add it up, it sure is not a half a day off, oh well, gotta pay for this habit somehow.

Erich and I hit the road heading south to Landover. Of course, everyone one else had been waiting around for our departure which was only 90 minutes later than it should have been. Anyway, we arrived at the contest site around 3:30 and began to set our site. We were one of the last to arrive. Jonathan, the contest organizer greeted us with a big smile and a handshake. This is the second year for this contest and he does a great job, always stopping by to see if you need anything. His was our first contest a little over a year ago, my how time flies when you are having fun. It was very warm, with a little breeze, not too bad. Everyone was buzzing about the forecast for Saturday, record setting heat, along with a heat advisory, wow, I can’t wait.

As soon as we were set up, we began to trim our meat. It wasn’t long and we had everything ready in the cooler. Al had decided on spaghetti with meat sauce for Friday nights dinner. He made the sauce at home and brought along some great crusty bread, all the makings of a great evening meal. What about the wine, we were, after all, having pasta, even at a BBQ contest, I think red wine is required with pasta.

Not to worry, to the bat mobile, its time for a road trip. Al and Erich, armed with driving instructions from Bobby, were off to a nearby liquor store. ( It would later be discovered that Erich wished he was armed with more than directions when traveling in some areas of Landover)

The contest was held at the Prince Georges Sports and Learning Complex. A very nice facility complete with indoor pools, water parks, running tracks, exercise rooms, the works. The entire complex is located right next to Fed Ex Field, home of the Washington Redskins. While the complex and stadium are new and improved, the same cannot be said for the surrounding immediate neighborhood containing the aforementioned liquor store.

Team mate Erich does not travel out of the Harford County area very often, or so it seems. Upon arriving at the liquor store suggested by veteran Washington area traveler team mate Bobby, Arthur and Erich were first met by an off duty PG County police officer working as security on the parking lot in his marked patrol unit. Not a real big deal, Erich has seen plenty of squad cars sitting in parking lots. The best was yet to come.

Upon entering the store the two wine thirsty Q’ers found a store right out of Baltimore City. The store was complete with the waiting room or lobby, separated from the rest of the store with a wall of bullet proof glass, the whole thing centered with a turnstile that the money and goods passed through when a transaction is made. They had a large selection of red wine that would go well with pasta, Al said there were 4 bottles on the shelf. Most of the remaining wine selection was better served in a brown paper bag. Upon leaving the store, our two heroes’ were approached by a man selling some type of elixir from a shopping cart. I guess it was a modern day snake oil salesman. Welcome to Landover Erich.

Erich was amazed at what he had witnessed. A sad commentary on life near our Nations capital, but thoughts and musings along those lines are better left for a blog elsewhere on the net. The bottom line is we all enjoyed some decent red wine with our delicious pasta meal and a good time was had by all.

A few fine cigars, a stroll around the grounds to see a few of the teams that we knew, and before we knew it ,it was time to nest up for the night. Did I mention it was around 73 degrees, pretty warm for trying to sleep. I laid down after I was sure the cooker had leveled off and I began to sweat. Even as tired as I was after getting up at 4:30, I could only manage a few hours of restless sleep, a little warm.

As daybreak came, the sun stayed hidden and offered some welcomed relief during the mornings activities. By about 10:00, ole Mr. Sun broke out and you could just feel the temperature climb. By then things were pretty much moving along and again, as in Chesapeake, we were on schedule. Everything except one butt that must have been made of stone, seemed like it hung out at about 150 for most of the morning, eventually finishing and joining the rest inside the cooler to wait for turn in.

The Who Are Those Guys team members are really working well together. The guys are moving ahead and anticipating the next move, all to the benefit of time and pressure being lifted. Working well together and still having loads of fun. A pleasure to be around, even when the product the head cook produces is sub par. I was happy with the chicken and the pork, the ribs and brisket, well, that was another story. If I could only learn how to cook.

We got everything boxed up and delivered to the judges with plenty of time to spare, I ranked our turn ins from best to worse, pork, chicken, ribs and brisket. The judges agreed slightly. Our finish was 4th place pork, 8th brisket, 16th ribs, and 17th chicken. 11th overall in a 29 team field. Again we were pleased.

The awards were held in the middle of an open field which felt like a frying pan, man, was it hot. The drive home was not too bad, as we were only about 90 minutes away. I was able to cool down, get a shower, a shave and some sleep. I had to get up early Sunday morning to cook beef, ham, and turkey for 150 folks at a friend’s daughters graduation party. Team mates Erich and Al volunteered to lend a hand with the Sunday cook and it was much appreciated.

Our friends and neighbors Stoddard & Brown won their second Grand Championship at this contest, they are on a roll. I e-mailed Brett, the Brown of Stoddard & Brown, to ask them if they would consider skipping the contest in Bel Air. I am still waiting to get my reply.(just kidding)

We have almost a month and a half until our next contest which will be held in Stevensville MD in July. In the meantime, Al and I are taking a BBQ cooking class being put on by my friend Steve Farin and his team I Smell Smoke along with the BBQ Guru guys. The class will be held at the Guru shop in Warminster PA June 28-29. For info, here is the link www.thebbqguru.com I think its gonna be a good one! Perhaps after taking this class, I may finally be able to good some decent Que, or maybe not, we’ll see. Stay tuned!!

Chesapeake Jubilee, Chesapeake VA, May 16-17

Driving to Mediocrity, is 500 miles too far?


The trailer was loaded and ready to go when Erich arrived at my house Friday morning at 3:30 AM. We were meeting Bobby and Al down near the interstate for the 5-hour drive south. It had been raining steadily most of the night and the forecast for Chesapeake was for possible showers until around Friday midnight, we hoped they were wrong.

The trip went off with out a hitch and we arrived at the contest site pretty much when expected. Skip, the contest organizer greeted us and he quickly showed us to our site. The rain had stopped and we set up camp in short order, it almost gave the impression that we knew what we were doing. Quite an illusion.

It was not long and we met our neighbors Steve Farin and Dirty Dick who had flown down to compete under the name of Dirty Smoke. Next to Steve was the gang from the BBQ Guru. (Bob tells us that Shotgun Fred is doing well considering what he has been through and is continuing with his rehab) On our other side were the Virginia BBQ Pirates, Tom and Christy, fresh off a great finish down in Salisbury. A very nice neighborhood.

On the bright side, it wasn’t raining and the sun actually came out after lunch, it was a really nice day, so far. We had decided we were not going to enter the “anything Butt” category that was to be held on Friday night. But, after some prodding from Steve, Al and I drove over to the Food Lion to see what we could find. We were thinking seafood but after a look at the seafood section, we opted for bratwurst, yea that’s close.

Our contest meats were prepped and in the cooler by mid afternoon, we cooked and entered the “anything butt”, the weather threatened, but never rained, all in all it was a very enjoyable evening. Well, until we decided to try to get some sleep. As the threatening weather blew out, the winds increased, with gusts in my estimate, 20-30+ mph at times. Our canopies stayed put, but a few teams were not as lucky, nothing as bad as Dover, but windy for sure. I usually bunk in the trailer near the cookers. Due to the direction of the wind, when a big gust would come, the roof of the trailer would buckle sounding similar to someone hitting the aluminum roof with rocks, and that was on the outside, you should have heard it inside. Between the rocking and the banging due to the wind, I thought I was in the haunted hold of a ship all night, needless to say, I didn’t get a lot of sleep.

Some teams complained later of the noise made by a few partying teams, but to tell you the truth, I couldn’t hear them over the noise my trailer was making, The Pirates next door were treated to my trailer noise as well, sorry guys! The big gusts finally subsided around 3:30 and I was able to get 2 hours sleep until my alarm sounded at 5:30.

The sun rose and it was a beautiful day. The meats came off on time and at temperature, it was if the Gremlins from Salisbury didn’t even make the trip. My guess is it was the rising cost of fuel, but who knows.

The chicken was prepped and went into the cooker on time. When we were finished we had bite through, moist chicken for the third week in a row, wow, I could not believe it! It’s amazing what a little practice will do. Did I say a little?

Everything went well, we were not behind, not rushed, no panic, no problems. I was even happy with all of the entries for the first time ever. That had me scared. This was a first. I felt that this thought alone was enough to sink us to the deep. After brisket was in, we broke down the site in record time, packed up the trailer and even had time to sit around and talk with Steve and Dick before the awards.

We wondered over to the stage area and were not in our seats long when we heard our name called for 8th place chicken. We also took a 4th place call in brisket. The rest of our results, well, let’s just say, not too good. This was a 29-team field, our pork was 20th and our ribs were a resounding 28th place, one away from DAL. Woohoo! We finished 14 overall. Mediocre. We received our first score of 4 ever from a judge, for rib tenderness. Which is hard to understand when another judge gave us a 9 in tenderness, (the highest possible score), but, that’s the way it goes. I hope not to make it a habit of collecting scores of 4. I think that maybe one of those Salisbury Gremlins might have a cousin living in somewhere in tidewater Virginia, but who knows.

Overall, we had a ball, even with the long drive. Congratulations to everyone that walked, especially to our neighbors Tom & Christy, the Virginia BBQ Pirates who won the grand championship while cooking in their forth contest ever. Way to go matey’s!

We had traveled over 500 miles in 2 days, spent a ton of money, gone with little sleep, cooked some good and some mediocre meat, (per the judges). Some might question our sanity, well, we already know I am not all there. Are we nuts? I guess a little. Will we go back next year? Better ask me later after I catch up on my rest. Will we try to improve our product? I think that’s the only thing you can count on, I am already working on that one!

Pork in the Park, Salisbury MD April 18-19

BBQ Gremlins; fact or fiction

BBQ Gremlins, do they exist? Many have pondered this age-old question ever since the Caveman first put fire to meat. The debate has raged for years, rivaling the argument about Big Foot or the Loch Ness Monster. While I can not say that I have ever personally observed these pesky creatures, I have observed the signs left behind when they decide to pay you a visit. I can not say for sure, but if you ever get a chance to capture or possibly photograph one of these little buggers, you would be set for life. I will caution you however, that there are several alleged Gremlin photos circulating around the internet and in the supermarket tabloids, but most have found to be fake. Use caution if you see one, my advice would be to observe from a distance, take a photograph, then grab him by the throat and throttle the life out of him. (I realize that this sounds a bit harsh, but if they ever pay you a visit, you will know what I mean) You can then stick the remains in a bottle of formaldehyde and go on the carnival/daytime talk show circuit; you’ll never have to work again, particularly after you appear on the Oprah Show.

The Salisbury Pork in the Park contest was scheduled for April 18 and 19th. The weatherman promised good weather and then he delivered. Two days of sunny mild weather was just great for mid April in the Del Mar Va area. Contest organizer Sandy Fulton told me early on that she had a weather connection and I believe her. The first two years of this contest had rain for both days. It seems after a rocky start; Sandy has managed wonderful weather for this year and last, I think she does have a weather guy! What Gremlins?

Our team was really looking forward to the season opener and a chance to get everyone together again. The contest at Salisbury has really grown, this year there were 83 teams. Some of the big names in BBQ were there which prompted many on the BBQ bulletin boards to say they would have to bring their A game, which I pretty much think they would have brought anyway.

Mike couldn’t make it to Salisbury, my wife Jo went along and had agreed to cook the chiefs choice on Friday night. Al was going to handle the Perdue chicken entry which was also set for Friday. Everyone else on the team was there, and we blasted off early Friday morning for what should have been a 3-hour tour. (remember Gilligans Island)

Note to self: when cooking in a contest of many teams, do not wait until arriving in the town where the contest is to be held before buying your garnish. We stopped at a Food Lion as soon as we hit Salisbury and the green leaf lettuce had already been picked over, what was left was not very attractive. Not to worry, we bought four crappy looking heads, (just in case), and Jo would run out later and grab a few better looking heads. She did run out, went to three stores and could not buy a head of green leaf, valuable lesson learned. The BBQ Gremlins were just warming up.

After stops for breakfast, charcoal, ice and garnish our three hour trip turned into a 4 1/2 hour trek. We were just glad to get there. Bobby, who worked a ½ day wasn’t far behind us and we left at 7 AM. Did I hear a giggling Gremlin?

We arrived and got set up without a hitch, met our neighbors, had a few beers and got the two Friday night categories turned in without too much difficulty. Later on our big meats went into our preheated Tall Boy right on schedule. A couple of fine cigars and all was well in our little corner of the world. We even had time for a little visiting. A nearly full moon along with warm temps made for a very delightful night. Who is afraid of a few Gremlins?

Saturday morning at 5:30 AM, my alarm sounded. It was sometime around 6:00 when I drug my large behind out of the rack to get the ribs into the smoke. While I was at it, I would check temperature on the big meats which had been cooking all night. To sum it up, they were not where they should have been, they were behind, way behind. This set the tone for the entire day. I tried everything I could but the bigs were standing still, the only thing getting done was a flat and picnic I had in the WSM, if all else failed, we would have something to turn in. As meats were wrapped and finished, I would move others between cookers. It was a game of musical chairs and the clock was ticking toward chicken time. I think the Gremlins had stayed up working while we slept, or so it seemed.

Did I mention the grease fire? Sometime after breakfast, as I was steadily jacking the temp up in the Tall Boy the Guru alarm sounded for a heat spike. I opened the door and found a grease fire in the lower section of the unit. Nothing like the smell of burning grease emitting from a cooker filled with unwrapped meat that was to be used for a contest entry, man, that ought to give us a good flavor! We extinguished the fire, cooled the cooker and moved on, what else could we do, it was nearing 10:00 AM. The Gremlins were laughing their Gremlin butts off.

I was behind on starting my chicken prep and rushing was not fun. I got everything ready and into the cooker for the first leg of the cook which by all previous time studies would take about 1.5 hours. The chicken came to temp in 1 hour, how could that happen? Those dam Gremlins. There is nothing like holding chicken for 30-40 minutes while all of the juice slowly leaves the area right before your eyes, what a feeling!

All of the pork eventually came off at temp and feeing done. The ribs were pretty much on schedule, but a slight miscalculation in time caused them to be a tad over cooked, but not too bad.

The brisket was another story. We eventually got it to temperature, but it sure didn’t “feel” done. We pulled them and tossed everything into the cooler to await turn in time. The Gremlins had to be holding their sides by this time.

I think I can offer a brief summary of our entries. Chicken, rubbery skin, moist inside, tender meat. A beautiful testament to my winters trials and tribulations, can we say time well spent, I think not, Gremlins again. Ribs, a little over cooked, not very pleasing to the eye, flavorful and tender, a bit dry. Pork, the picnic and one butt felt very good, the other butt was like pot roast, overall, I thought it was our best pork submission yet. The brisket, we cooked two packers and a flat. The first flat from a packer I cut into for a taste test actually looked like it emitted a cloud of dust. Did somebody say dry, as dry as a popcorn fart. A repeat occurred on the next packer flat. That left the flat we cooked solo. At least the knife would cut it, but I don’t think I would go so far as to use the word tender. That had to be Gremlins I heard earlier, somebody get a net.

We got everything into the boxes, and by the way, Lettuceman Erich did a yeoman’s job making good looking boxes from crappy looking lettuce. We were behind in time during the entire turn-in procedure. The ribs, I wanted to take out and rebuild the entire box, but we were down to two minutes to go, we had to close the lid and send them in. Gremlins at work.

As Erich was slicing the remaining brisket into pieces for the team to take home, he had to stop several times as he was overheating the electric knife. Man, that’s what I call a tender brisket, who wants some? Needless to say, I brought home a ton of brisket meat this week, oh well, it does make good chili. Maybe I’ll feed it to the Gremlins!

We packed up the gear and shuffled over for the awards. This was our fifth contest and I honestly sat down and thought there is no way we are getting a call in the strong field that was there. I was almost right, we heard our named called for 4th place pork. Pork, which had been our anchor in Landover and New Holland. Our first call ever for pork, in a field of 83, not too bad. Just when we thought we ran the Gremlins out of town, we left the contest without ever taking a team picture; I guess they got the last laugh.

The score sheets would show we finished 16th overall, a decent effort in a very strong field. Our scores were 49th chicken, 22nd ribs, 4th pork, 36th brisket, 11th Perdue Chicken, and 46th in chefs choice. Not bad despite the efforts of the BBQ Gremlins.

While no official confirmed Gremlin sightings were recorded in Salisbury this past weekend we feel certain they were present. The signs they leave behind were everywhere at our site. I would swear to you that I could hear them laughing at me several times, especially right after I put out the grease fire, although, the laughter could have been coming from the teams around us but I really don’t think that was likely. So, the myth continues. I cannot offer any solid evidence as to their existence, it is all circumstantial, as is evident by this story. I can only hope that their visits are not frequent, and hope not to see or hear them again for the rest of the season, and if I do, I think I have a trap that will work.

We had a ball, the weather was great. We saw some old friends and made some new, overall, the trip was a success. There was one bit of sad news announced at the cooks meeting Friday night. Shotgun Fred Pirkle, the inventor and manufacturer of the BBQ Guru and the Caldera Tall Boy that we use suffered a stroke at the contest site on Friday morning. For those that don’t know Fred, he is a real ambassador for the sport of BBQ cooking and an all round nice guy. Very few cooks take their walk to the stage to accept an award with as much enthusiasm as Fred. Thanks to the quick reaction of bystanders and local paramedics, they were able to get him quickly to the hospital in Salisbury. The BBQ Guru team went on to take a 1st place call in pork and finish a very respectable 12th over all. We wish Fred a speedy recovery and will keep him, his family, and the entire Guru gang in our thoughts and prayers and ask that you do as well. Thanks.

Seven days and counting

Checking my list and checking it twice


Today is April 11 our season opener is in Salisbury on April 18th , seven days from today. I have had all winter to get ready and guess what, I am behind. This past weekend I pulled everything out of the trailer, cleaned and organized all the drawers and boxes. Scrubbed the cooker and went over my checklist.

I still have a bunch of supplies to gather and of course, the last minute items. Why is it I feel like time is running away. I have 7 days left which includes a weekend, plenty of time, yea right. I think part of the feeling is anxiety and part is excitement. Both related to the new season beginning.

I think I need to listen to my own advice. Relax and have fun. That is what we will do. I have cooked a ton of various meats over the winter and have learned a very valuable lesson. I have learned that I do not know one dam thing about cooking BBQ, period. A very valuable lesson indeed.

One thing you can count on, we WILL have fun. I just received a new shipment of some mighty fine premium cigars, we have a jug of agave juice already on board. We are ready to go. If we get to Salisbury and don’t have it, we will buy it or we didn’t need it anyway!

I am looking forward to the new season, looking forward to seeing old friends and making new ones. I will enjoy hanging out with my teammates, drinking a few beers and maybe eating some good grub. If we get in the mood, we might even try our hand at some Que.

So, if you are out and about on the BBQ circuit this year and see our setup, please stop in, say hello, introduce yourself, sign our guest book and maybe have a cold drink. We would like to meet you. We would also like to take this time to wish all of the other competitor’s good luck and safe travels for the upcoming BBQ season. We look forward to seeing everyone again. Happy trails.

Spring 2008

Get ready!

It’s hard to believe that it is already early March. Time sure flies when your having fun. Winter around here was not too bad so far. A little snow, a little ice, some cold days, overall I would consider it fairly mild. Although, you would not know it looking at the checkbook when paying the heating bill.

We are planning to compete in seven contests this coming season. I have checked with the team members and we have agreed on a schedule. Most of the entry forms have been submitted and the excitement is building.

I have been busy writing this winter. Of course, I have been writing in the blog. I am not too sure that anyone is reading, however, I will continue to write for both of my loyal readers out there! I hope to keep updates coming when the season begins. I may even attempt to submit some contest recaps to KCBS for possible submission in the Bull Sheet. We will see and I will keep you posted.

Practice cooking has been on my list for this off season. I have been cooking alot of BBQ. My wife thinks I should be committed. I have been spending a lot of quality time with chicken thighs. The neighbors don’t care, as long as I keep feeding them Que. As for the kids, they are about filled up on BBQ and I can’t say as I blame them. Its to the point now when I light up the smoker on Sunday morning, the kids ask if we can order a pizza.

This past weekend I worked on chicken and ribs again. I was hoping I would be finished with chicken after this weekend, but it looks like I will be at it again next week, I am close, but still have some work to do. I have been doing some experimentation with some interesting results. I have also been working hard on my pork and brisket. Did I call this work?;) Needless to say, it will be a while before I crave chicken thighs again.

I have been squirreling away supplies all winter so I do not have to buy then all at once and have just about everything we need. The trailer soon will be moved from its winter parking spot. I plan to pull everything out and reorganize, removing any items that we haven’t used and trying to make more efficient use of the space that we have.

Our first contest for the year will be April 18-19 in Salisbury MD. Last year I cooked with Steve at this one and had a lot of fun. This year he is cooking with his regular team, “I Smell Smoke”. This is a great spot for a contest and the folks that run it do a great job. The event website shows 52 teams already registered and it is only early March. Every time I speak to one of the guys on the team, the conversation quickly turns to BBQ. Everyone is anxious for the season to begin.

At Salisbury, they have two additional categories on Friday night. My wife, Jo, is going to cook the Anything But event. She has been working hard with her planning and possible presentation. There is also a Perdue chicken contest. I think we will also enter this one as well.

On the many forums that I visit, folks are also looking forward to the new season. Contests are becoming a little more frequent down south and I am sure they will be moving north with the approach of springtime and warmer temperatures. Threads on the forums have discussed everything associated with contest cooking from garnish to judges and gas prices. Folks all around are looking forward to the 2008 competition season. Cabin fever would be a good term here.

This winter I became a member of the Mid Atlantic BBQ Association. The organization has been around for a while and sponsors, among other things, a BBQ Expo in April. Recently, as a result of the hard work of some of the members, they have improved their website. The web site now contains past event photos and a newly added MABBQA discussion forum. It is a very good place to exchange ideas and thoughts on BBQ competition and cooking in general.

A few hardy souls competed this past weekend in two winter contests up north. I am not sure we are ready with our, “cots under the easy-up” set up to tackle a mid winter event yet, but kudos to those that did. Some mighty brave souls.

For many here in the mid Atlantic area, Salisbury is the season opener. I am sure I speak for many of the teams in this region; April 18th can’t come soon enough!